psychicsizzler

Rich dreams, none too farfetched

30 Aug 2009 3 Comments

by Sindhu Murthy in Music Tags: dreams, Hindustani classical music, Jaipur Atrauli gharana, Lord Shiva, Pt Rajshekhar Mansur

Once upon a time, there lived two musicians. Both were, the greatest that human kind had ever seen or listened to.  One always outdid the other. They both scaled great heights and set revolutionary standards. They explored the myriad dimensions of music and reveled in it. Their talent was a matter of pride for the people of the land, who rejoiced in it. It was a sheer treat to the senses, when they both performed one after another, one with the other, complementing each other, letting music conquer them. All was so fine as long as they let music conquer them. But that dastardly fatalistic facet of life showed up. It perhaps happened all too soon. It was time to determine the better between the two. The world had all the while hailed them the greatest but they desperately urged for evaluation. They yearned for recognition individually, believing their talent was not combined, but one was certainly superior than the other – even when the world had given in to their superiority of existence. The singers appealed to the people of the land. Alas, were they all too inadequate to judge? Ill-equipped to gauge these stalwarts? Even the most erudite resigned to the all-empowering greatness of these singers. They  begged to be spared of committing the sin of judging what they perceived to be God’s own best insight into divinity.  Left with no option and steadfast to their purpose, the musicians set foot into Lord Shiva’s Kailasam. Pleading with the Lord, they begged to be heard so that He may pass the final judgement. When lesser mortals had failed, their faith in the Almighty became ever more unshakeable.  Smiling, the Lord acceded. The divine feat commenced. The two rendered their best, with all the fervour they could muster, which seemed colossal to the Lord Almighty Himself.  Thus, several eons passed by, as the Lord revelled in divinity Himself, flummoxed with intoxication. He heaved a deep sigh, smiled gently, and asked each of the singers to sit in each of his ears, and continue singing… while He would let His inner senses decide, if the need arises… thus he passed His judgement, and resumed His eternal tapas… as He lived His dream forever – never to be de-mesmerised from this tapas.

Dreams come true. They really do. I wished for this one from the bottom of my heart, from the core of my soul, my prayers were sincere and the dream was serious enough. Yes, the category of ‘fulfilled dreams’ have that commercial star shining at the top right corner that intends to ‘but’ in a disclaimer. You can’t wish you suffer a stomach ache the day you have to make a presentation before your boss, lets say. Not so mundane, never that lame. It cant be so trivial a wish at all, for heaven’s sake. It needs to be a gigantic, massive dream. So big that it captures the Lord Almighty’s fancy, makes Him sit up, shakes Him off His meditation to gasp – Wow! …. Yeah, that needs attention dude!

Now, I have always, always, for the last 6 years or so (seems like since forever actually), wanted to meet the stalwart, the grand, the god-like, the less celebrated, the less known but the most divine, the most revered musician – Pt Rajshekhar Mansur. I completely lost my senses for a good 5 seconds when I saw him for the very first time, in person, at his door step, as he smiled gently and opened the door to me while I stood completely frozen. The four raags – Godhan Gouri, Lachcha Saakh, Miyan ki Todi and Baraari that I had compulsively-obsessively listened to, medidated to, suddenly pulsated with all their vibrancy all at once. I was levitating, it seemed, what with the guru of Jaipur Atrauli gharana before me, whose aura had captivated me, putting me into a trance. Now, I had graded this moment so high in my head all these few years that I thought I would never ever be blessed to experience it. Things graded too high vapourise into thin air and become one with the celestial world. One requires fortune coupled with eligibility to meet people of his stature, you know. And here I was, neither qualified nor fortunate (going by my track record of misfortune). I mustered wakefulness to mutter a hello sir, I hope I am on time. I was desperate to not pull an Ally Mc Beal in all my desperation and nervousness. I give into hallucinations when I am in sheer nervousness and despair. Rather, I try very hard to relish that moment of truth in all its vitality, lest it ceases to exist.  But I also hallucinate when caught in situations that I wanna escape from. Horribly enough,  I equally wish the culprit making me indulge in wishful thinking empathised with my predicament, understood that I am vulnerable to hallucinations and forgave, but remember the siamese connection between hard luck and me? Even as I was in the midst of the most divine aura, my mind was monkeying around to check on all the corners of my mind, vaccuming it clean off everything else, making ample room to accomodate this memory for many lifetimes to come, if possible, to fully satiate the thirst of this soul. Now, settling down with a the nicest cup of tea and the crispiest couple of cookies, what I had for the next 45 minutes that was actually intended to be a brief 15 minute interaction, became the greatest rendezvous in my life, with this giant of a scholar. What of satiation, when this turned out to be a raging, furious appetiser!

Not quite sure how to start, I thought for a while too little. Just then, he initiated. “What do you know about music?”